Last week I underwent Lasik surgery. It went great.
While paying beforehand I had a brief frustration with the administrator of my health savings account. They seem to put up as many obstacles as they can to prevent you from spending your own money on your own medical expenses.
Ultimately the only consequence was that I paid a third of the $3000 bill with after-tax money. This is only an annoyance. Two thirds was paid with pre-tax money, which makes a big difference.
The surgery itself went great. I was horizontal, looking up into a lighted machine. Numbing eyedrops were instilled. I focused on a green dot. One eye was patched. My eyelashes were taped back. A flat device was placed on my eyeball. Some sort of cut was made, but all I felt was pressure. My vision smeared to one side and then turned to black with white starlike specks that brightened and then pulsed gently about, like powder suspended on a drop of dark oil.
For four to six seconds a computerized beep sounded during which, I assume, the lens was corrected by laser. A verbal ending message sounded but I am not sure if it was a computerized female voice or that of a technician.
My vision returned and I focused on the green dot, which was now large and blurry. It shrunk back almost to its original size, though it remained blurry.
Then came the other eye. I remained alert for the slightest twinge of pain but there was no pain at all, at any point. I listened for verbal instructions from the doctor and staff but there wasn’t much I had to do or remember to do.
I was driven home by my parents. I kept my eyes closed throughout most of Mr Show, Apocalypse Now, and Tremors. I napped because of the diazepam. I woke up while Colonel Kurtz was telling the story of the snail crawling along the razor. "This is my dream; this is my nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight razor, and surviving."
Later I got up, continued my eyedrop regimen, and walked to get a coffee.
I really enjoyed my brief walks that day and the rest of the week. I indulged deliberately in the sense of sight, and I will continue to do so. I realized that winter in Minnesota is a good time for this procedure because I can look at the definition and crispness of my clean snowy surroundings (although less so with the recent rain).
I am truly grateful for this technology and for the skilled staff that provided me with sharp vision again.
Included: I trashed $250 in prescription eyewear that became junk overnight.
pseudoisaac 